POLISH VERSION

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In the frontal line of the brave combatants, the dear motherland from the enemy
To defend manfully and fall down, it’s beauty end of a happy life indeed.
Whereas falling down the native city, and the fertile fields ancestral
To eat in despair refuge bread, where’s such agony as this?
(Tyrtej vel Tyrteus).

Chapter 5. Stage by stage; first days of the exile.

Prisoners transport – is mother still alive? – a field hospital and the wounded men – the first shelter at a former college boardinghouse in Ostrowiec.

This night the train moved all the time without any stops. To be sure, every time Angus awakened, he toured, not swift, but steady. Angus after exciting and exhausting experiences (adventure) slept rather early and long, until the daylight become bright. The night being cool, the prisoners closed the small, oblong windows with anything they could and the air got stale, but now opened them again and crowded around them, trying to see and guess where to they may go.

Just the same, they were in the move eastwards and by now, they probably left behind the lands incorporated direct into the Germany and were now on the just occupied territory, known next as GG. With the day on, it become a little warmer even if the clean wind from the fields blew trough the whole wagon. Now the train stopped several times and the opinions, where they may be, changed. Some considered, in the next time they may see Warsaw, other opposed, that this is not the route to Warsaw, they travel another way. Angus did not try to push himself to the windows, anyway they were too high for him to look outside. He should step on something (and there were only the straw and some personal belongings the people would not allow to touch them), or held himself up with his hands, not exactly an easy and comfortable sightseeing. In fact he didn’t give a damn what was the destination; go into the unknown was very well. Only occasionally, when the little windows emptied, he could see the sky with rather little clouds or branches of the trees. The tension of the least days left him, but he felt, after a little time it will come back. He again shall need all his strength, but now was time to rest and perhaps to dream, lacking in the last time. It shall be what it will be, he shall see in time.

In the afternoon, the soldiers of the escort allowed to open the doors. Hard to believe, it was already 2-th of December, yet the weather was as warm, like in summer, at least in middle of the day.

The train rolled slow over a long bridge over a river and stopped on a plain field, but the rails multiplied and from distance, some building was visible. Some of the prisoners talked (which expost proved false), that they crossed the Vistula River near Puławy. Although the German escort with the increasing distance got fewer eager, they still allowed none outsiders near the train. But shortly the prisoners were allowed to get water, that is not to come out from the wagons, but take it as the people from the outside agree to take some containers and bring them back full of water. Occasionally they heard, the train is not south, but a long way north of Warsaw, near the Małkinia.

Then again, the train moved, but from the time they were could hold open the door until twilight, talk and take the water. The command told them, there is a change, from now strong restricted is only coming out from the wagons, this shall be punished with a bullet and the escort shall shoot without further warning.

Yet just before the doors with the twilight closed again, Angus was a witness of rather extraordinary happening. The train halted several teens meters from the bushes, nearby them occurred a path. At one moment on this passed a small group of people with bags, pause and the next small group and the next and finally continued a chain of them. The German escort took not interest in this event. Occasionally some other people moved in the opposite direction.

In the evening silence, the voices carried a long-distance and Angus heard distinctly every word.

- Where are you going? –

- Running away from the paradise. And you? –

- To the paradise! –

- Do not be so stupid, come back. You do not know anything, did not see, how it is there and if you do, it will be already too late; you shall regret this to the end of an extremely short life. –

- And you may see, what is here to come, even worse! -

The fugitives, the longline of the coming in and the small body of running out passed by, going in opposite directions. A clear supposition, the train stooped not faraway from the Soviet border, which at the time still was penetrable. At the late evening, the train moved back, and then changed direction again.

This time Angus could not sleep a longtime. Sure, he dreamed fighting the Germans. Nevertheless, as he could not exactly imagine how now such a fight looks like and how are the conditions on a battlefield, he rather figured out the times of the Boleslaw Chrobry, the first great Polish king. Angus already should advance for a knight for brave deeds and got armor from a bested enemy, when he slept in. All the people in the whole wagon already slept a considerable time.

On this day, they crossed the Vistula River somewhere around Puławy. Afterwards the train stood a longtime near some forest, if fact they saw this day several forests and stopped several times for long, Angus remembered his journey in the evacuation train three months ago. One small difference was, in the time before he could get a bullet remaining on the train, and now it was opposite, if somebody would spring down from the train, he may eat a bullet.

The next day the train stood again somewhere between Radom and Skarżysko. Morning was frigid and the day too, and after a time it drizzled, the first rain after many dry days. Obviously, the Germans got controversial orders and were not sure jet, what to do with the prisoners, because the train chiefly stood or moved in different trends (directions).

Finally, near the end of the short December day they rolled into some bigger station, where the German escort opened the doors one after another, yelling:

- "Alle raus! Schnell! Schnell"! (All-out! Move!)

The surprised prisoners, who did not know neither they arrived at their destination, nor that they could from now on leave free. They expected another camp or prison. Instead of this, the escorts now only interested themselves with as quickly as possible emptying the train and stopped interfering with the incredulous people, who got out. Nobody barred the way. Nobody hold up the small groups, which detached themselves from the confused mob around the train. Nobody shoot, or tried to stop the running away. After a time it became obvious that everyone could go, where he would. However, where to?

Because this surprised and shocked the prisoners, only now collecting theirs belongings and baggage scattered on the floor of the wagons, it resulted in a temporary chaos. Some already got out and now attempted to come back to fetch their baggage. Some tried to go down, which was not easy, especially for the elderly and not fit people, as the wagon’ floor was high up and there were none ladders or steps. Some right by the door tried to help them, blocking the doors, a right pall-mall. Meantime, into the half-unloaded wagon, came several German soldiers from the escort, prompting the people, yelling, finally swearing and “helping” the human load to get down with rifle butts. To be sure, they did not beat the former prisoners, only pushed them. However, Angus mother, rather a substantial and heavy lady, although several moths before under rapid-fire in the field she could outrun Angus, now seemingly was not fit for jumping. She came on the brink and could not decide for the next step. She should sit down on the brink, but there was not time, pushed with the butt (or perhaps only threatened with, Angus could be not sure) she fell. Angus waiting down was not able to held her, they both collapsed and she crashed hard with his head on the rail. Although with help of the others, she got up and quick, but was dizzy and the first time in the war, Angus had to lead her and care about her.

 Capsule: the solidarity and team spirit of the Polish society in time of need and trial.

One may notice, that at this time of distress and calamity, Polish people displayed a high degree of unity and reacted speedy and proper for the most ill-fate victims. Well, at least until the time when the best between them were not dead; the occupants terminated them out in the first turn. Angus never before not later met with such a universal, widespread commitment, unsophisticated sacrifices and at the same times a rare combination of generous altruism with a clever economy.

It was so, as if at great calamity and catastrophe the human nature of the simple, common people polarized, the great evil against the best virtues. For example the transport of prisoners arrived only just now unexpected to the Ostrowiec Świętokrzyski (Angus read the name on the board over the station building). They were at the depot only minutes, well, below a half hour and already between the multitude, in the mob of the mindless, subconscious, confused and jumbled in havoc people appeared volunteers. Delegates of different committees, humanitarian organizations or just ad hoc organized people, who got wind about the transport, came to offer relief.

This one example does not finish the cause. After the lost campaign, everywhere were many victims, wounded, displaced, refugees, often destitute, without assets, unable to survive, a vast number of the unhappy in need. These, who experienced the salvation and survival, without any considerations helped as much as they possibly could the unlucky ones, not caring for his personal material loss or business, this was simply a common cause. The people neither then nor now consists of angels of mercy, but with a popular fashion and good example even the worse ones could not break out. Angus never again did see and experienced such a competition in good deeds, in the today time it may seem just incredible.

To Ostrowiec, not a big city, arrived unexpected and unannounced several thousand of the displaced and dispossessed people. Even before, cam the wounded, well, not exactly the killed, but their families, the sick, many children, often without any means; not mentioning the fugitives. In short, German dropped loots of people in need of help.

Nevertheless all the arriving got some shelter, nobody left hungry or thirsty, with the help improvised quick and efficient. Probably the people on this former world were from a better material as now. Angus never saw a spontanic action like this, neither in Poland, nor in any other country or community.

A part of the people took under his roof the nearest deported on the spur of moment, although they must be aware, that in future this may be a heavy burden. They take to his flats or houses estrangers, who may not go, not take leave, because they have not any place to live and after a time may become troublesome. It is a fact, that at the time nobody expected, the war could take so long. All Poles still believed, in the spring, latest in summer Germany must surrender.

Ad hoc improvised corporate bodies took care of the rest. They lead a substantial part of the displaced to the sites of different organizations, from the benevolent or education societies to rosary ringlets, schools (if not occupied by German troops), even to oratories.

Angus supporting his mother, with a bunch of other people lead by some civilians went by wet, dark road. He felt responsible not only for mother, but as well for the belongings, bags and packages, which he was not able to carry and could manage only because thanks the help of unknown people. He behaved not exactly his best, afraid, the helpers may bolt with these. He remembered this afterwards with shame, but this was the first time he had to act for the family and was afraid he may be inadequate for the situation and afterwards the mother may blame him. Anyway, if something like this happened, he could not prevent this, but at the time his suspicions were absurd.

In about twenty minutes, they arrived to a fabrics hostel of the Ostrowiec Ironworks. It was yet out of gear, but the repairs exactly finished in the first days of war. Angus with mother temporary took one corner of a great, empty room, the remaining corners offered for other people. The chamber already painted and washed clean, so was the wooden floor and windows, but there was none furniture. They had to sleep on the cover laid direct on the bare wood. They got pots with hot coffee, bread and something on top with a promise, first thing in the morning there shall be a supply of beds and some household equipment. The main, there was a bathroom and they could wash off the journey.

The warm clothing they could not take from their home, neither blankets nor sheets. Nevertheless, aunt Frania and family supplied already them already in the camp. Familiar to the prison condition they could sleep well enough (if a little straw would be welcome).

The next morning mother sent him shopping. It was a sensation, simply to go into a store and be able to buy there fresh muffins, milk and miscellaneous other belongings, just as he did home. He had to pinch himself on the way to assure, it is not a dream. Now he could understand what the prisoners left out could feel.

After breakfast, he tried to persuade mother to lay down, because after yesterday fall she had still pain in the head and problems with balance. Angus insisted of visiting a doctor, he already in the shop asked about direction and address and wanted go and arrange this. However, mother considered it unnecessary, she felt better after the night.

Women-folk act queer, Angus could never understand them. Mother had to hang at all cost some frills and finery on the window, if only the one, near which they slept. Angus could not understand this, for him the window fresh and clean, painted recently, was the most natural object, pretty enough. However, all the women of his family, the former and the future, got in a frenzy at the view of a bare window and could not rest, before they hung there something.

Mother had not a regular curtain, but sought something out. She did not listen to his comment, she was determined. If she would be dying, she would first hang a drapery on the window if it this were her last doing on this world.

Now, without any delay, she commanded him on the chair (they already got two chairs and a table, the beds should arrive a little later), but it was a high window. It was necessary to position the chair on the table and only then, Angus was able to arrange the fabrics according to her instructions. Still not perfect, in her imagination the suspension should be different. Not pleased with the result she wanted personally apply the corrections. Without noticing Angus’ protest, she stepped on the provisory construction.

No way could this end well. In the next moment she fell down from the pyramid, Angus again caught her but she was too heavy to hold and again she struck with the head, but this time not the rail, only the wooden plank. Nevertheless, this time she lost consciousness for good.

In a general mess and turmoil, all the present in the room people throw themselves to help, taking her up, lay her down again on the blanket, others bring water, everyone presetting his opinion and advises something else. Lucky, Angus go already the address of the doctor, to whom he wanted before direct his mother. Waiting not a second longer for the unsuccessful attempt to return her to life, he already started to run trough the wet street. It dazzled with stops from yesterday, the long period of dry wetter obviously ended. On the way, he bypassed a chapel or small church, but did not stop for a second to ask the God for backing, though still mighty religious. And also mighty terrified, it was the first time he was so much afraid for his mother. Under the rapid-fire he remained always convinced, that nothing and nobody can harm her. He considered her as indestructible as the planet.

And now, without any warning at all, any notice, any reason or prompt, unexpected, like a thunderbolt from a blue, clear sky, without any cloud, any cause, in one second everything was well and in the next the world shattered, when, why? Now, on his way he could not even think clear, not talk to God, choose the best offer, consider what currency could please Him best, what may attract, sweet-talk Him, he only kept saying all the time: “My God, take better my life, I’m younger, I may live longer, swap this for Mammy life, I anyway want not live anymore, I would prefer to take hundred blows and die hundred times”. Although all the time he remained aware, that it is a plain nonsense, a bid without any value, he can’t offer to God what is anyway His and can’t promise Him suicide, this would be a sacrilege, atrocity, that is if all this, what was his faith has any logic, if the whole world has any sense.

If so lost in himself, at least he lost not his way, directed right in the shop, he kept running on wet pavements and stones, occasionally asking about the street and the right house, as if he was himself a stone falling the shortest way down and throwing away any obstacles. He caught the doctor exactly on his way out to the hospital. Angus was not sure afterwards, how he persuaded him. The doctor had a busy time right now, many bad cases and some worse. Angus could not sure, but maybe the right argument was, he already took a cab (“dorojka”). He told the doctor, he should be right on time in the hospital or even a few minutes earlier, riding. Angus shall hold the cab and after seeing Angus mother, deliver “Sir Doctor” straight to the hospital.

Anyway the main was, he succeeded in bringing the doctor and mother still was alive. She opened his eyes, but was not aware, where she was and what happened, she could not get up, has none balance even sitting fell down again.

Doctor decided it is concussion of the brain, but he could not say, how serious without a x-ray examination of the scull and especially its base. The cab, which Angus promised should deliver the doctor to the hospital, took in addition also the women. She went to the infirmary for the examination and Angus left alone. It was the first possibility to close eyes and pray proper, almost losing contact with the external world. But the external world remained; Angus was not aware how cold he was. He was shacking all the time, simply could not check himself. Lucky, the small room where he waited was not only warm, rather hot. It took a longtime, before he learned anything at all and then only, the patient must stay a few days longer.

It took hours, before mother installed herself in a bed in a small chamber containing altogether eight patients. In fact, Angus never knew the name of the doctor, who saved them. Now he called Angus and announced, that he need not to worry, it is simple concussion of the brain without further complications. The X-ray examination is clean and the conscience coming back. But he had to accept Angus too into the hospital. If only mother could feel he is at her side and safe, in fact this was the critical condition of her recovery. To be exact, Angus is sick, he got a cold and the doctor finds a severe threat to his lungs. But between us, the most important point is the psychic well-being of his mother. Such a clever boy needs not telling, but for a pair of days Angus shall be better invisible, without any smell, and not speak to much. Afterwards, he may aid his mother, possibly be a help to the wounded too. Yet first, he should be sure, the cold, even the catarrhs are already gone. Before this, he shall hold his distance, not contacting anyone. Doctor spoke lightly, making fun. He called Angus his colleague and added, he could do not less for an instructor, who in such short time dispensed him with so much of good advice and in minutes educated him better, as several university lectures.

Angus this time did not open is mouth, only bowed many times. To be sure he thought, even before he spoke very little and only the necessary info, answering the questions. Maybe, different person may take different view and memory.

Mother remained in the hospital not one week, but almost three. Angus had not a doubt, that after a week she was in reasonable good state. He suspected, the next two she shameless exploited her status, saying it straight, simulated. Angus make her because of this discrete and quiet, but severe bounces, insisted, that overstaying in dock she takes the place necessary now for the more needing. She explained, that she is a paying patient, all the patient of this room are on such status (terms). Her sister Frania provided her with money, which she can apply now, in the critical moment. With luck, she found a place where she may regenerate and better do it proper, than left in a hurry before she feels strong and healthy again. Perhaps she is a little overdrawing now, making up, but it is keeping up the appearances for the sake of the doctors, a simple precaution that nobody accuses them for keeping the paying patient unnecessary. Anyway, she surely is not healthy and strong, simply afraid to come out; she needs a little time more.

The fairly new and at first outsized, a few years old building ot the Community Insurance Hospital in Ostrowiec functioned now as Field Hospital of Red Cross. I the war it became packed full of the wounded soldiers, in fact it could not contain them all. Shortly before, they used every corner, every cubicle, including corridors, place under the stairs, ceilings, even basement. Now, it was the third month after the campaign and considerably fewer of the wounded, so a few rooms could be economized for civilian patients of the former public hospital. One of these rooms was supplied with eight beds with between screens (because still it was not possible to separate the men and the women). Mother occupied one of the beds, and next by a small wonder, they somehow placed a small bed for Angus, also detached by a screen.

Exactly there took place in about a week this difficult, secret talk in hush-hush voice (the other patients separated only by light linen screen, should not heard the conversation). Mother’ arguments didn’t convince Angus, he was sure if this all is not a crime, at least a dishonest deception; especially concerning himself, he felt not entitled. But on the other side, he was so happy because the terrible moment ended rather well, that he let off further drilling the theme, decided to be useful and pay off his debt with good deeds.

In fact, the mother and her son had long an extraordinary luck now and before, always found a safe niche, a good recess. So it was at time of evacuation. Next into the concentration camp they came, when the living condition in the first time were still not too bad, especially the guards bein normal people, soldiers of Wehrmacht reserve units, not any beast in human shape. Even the weather was warm and good. The Polish community could at first help the prisoners with provision, so there was not hunger. Even the transport occurred in the last warm days of a beautiful autumn. Several weeks after a few days even in a wagon for people would be a serious problem, if in a cattle wagon (as the Germans transported the prisoners) it could be a mortal. In the next and further months, in period of great frosts, to the stations Radom, Skarżysko, Płaszów and others show up whole transports of stiff corpses in form of deep-frozen meat. Remembering his own experiences, Angus considered the real cause of death might be suffocation, the lack of oxygen with all windows almost hermetically sealed. He heard the stupid comments, that nobody perished jet because of stink, but many of cold. Exactly the opposite, with lower temperature the consumption and demand for oxygen increases. Anyway, he could ask nobody, as mentioned, the unlucky ones cannot comment, only the lucky do remember (sometimes they even write memoirs).

The first days Angus never left the room, especially because the mother was real remarkable quiet and reacted only automatically, but often wanted his silent presence. Yet after a few days she began to talk, and the room contained only senior people, who liked the chat, it was they main amusement and joy. Angus watched this with wonder. The elderly of both sexes (now, they must take pace according to hospital possibility, it was the first and only room for civilians) talked so, as it the least years were constant visitors. In fact as if being sick was their professional business. At the beginning some details were interesting, but after a time strange. For example, they had their own, particular views on medicine and functions of human body. Angus in the first days had a cold and catarrh (which, a bit exaggerated to a possible threat to the lungs served as official warrant to let him remain with his mother in hospital). One of the elderly with a strange accent commented:

– This is well, catarrh cleans the gray matter in the brain and this way develops the intelligence and wits”. –

Angus had some doubts, but did not comment them, as well as other remarkable ways and means of unconventional medicine, like increasing the health of liver and even heart by exposure to light in a barrel lined with electric bulbs etc. It does not follow; there may be not a sound grain in some of them.

They were patients with different maladies of age, used to cyclic visit in hospital for general inspection and repairs. They were difficult customers, strongly opinionated and often disagreeing with the physicians, especially with the young ones. And more so, if the doctor was of the better sex. As it happened, this room was under the care of “Lady Doctoooor”.

Angus amazed, heard at first with interest, but next had enough of this. He now took interest only, if and what said his mother. She talked sparingly, but thank God with a sense so all seemed good. In time, she began as well to talk with the strange society and obviously tamed, needing him less and less.

At least he could not bear any longer this small talk; his clothes and were in a little chest by the bed and he had neither concrete direction nor prohibitions. If he remains longer in this atmosphere, he was sure, that despite clearance given by the catarrh, his brain with all the gray matter stops. He dressed quickly and with excitement started with general view of the building. Most of all, he wanted see the wounded heroes, but remembering the doctors warning, resigned of this to spread not the infection. That beings so, he decided for a short stroll on the near streets.

He began with the close by, Kiliński Street and the main Third May Street. He saw nothing of Ostrowiec yet, before being too busy to remember. Not a big city and in the darkly, wet day looked not his best, but afterwards he rated it to the beautiful. Sure, comparing to Poznań, the houses were smaller and rather low; in fact, there was little of multiflat houses and imposing buildings, no tramways, no organized community communication. Transport supplied the horse carriages and bicycles; trucks and autos only, as understood, for the German. He walked on the foot to the bridge, some distance further there was the railway station and the Iron Works. Right before he saw something interesting, a narrow, restricted only for pedestrian arch hanging over the river from one side of the flood walling to the other. It was some masterpiece of the former century, made in the Iron Works. He walked to the portal of the Iron Works and the returned, recognizing now the way he rode before in the cab. He noticed the first time the newspapers, edited by the Germans in Polish language and called common “reptile-press”. Curious, he bought some and read more of the displayed on house walls. The top news concerned the Soviet-Finnish war. The Germans expressed his full sympathy for their ally, Soviets.

Typically, they announced that it was the little Finland, who attacked Soviets, firing on their territory heavy artillery. After the aggression Finland presented a false claim the country has none heavy guns, except some stationary in betony forts on the approaches to the main port and capital of Finland from the see-side. Of course, this foul falsification helped them not. Soviets with indignation repulsed the proposal of establishing a mixed commission, which should verify the facts inspecting the border area and eventually all the Finland’ territory.

The new newspapers would be repulsive even for the reptiles. They fell flat before the Germany and told near heaven their close confederate, the heroic Red Army, her power, efficiency etc. There was only one damn curious question, why all the stunning victories happen again and again in the same places. In addition, the situation plans of the front didn’t change. It seemed almost, as if the Red Army after starting the offensive and winning a masterful conquest and many triumphs was so disciplined, never snap yourself out from hand and moved not one meter into the enemy territory. Such victories one could understand only if the Red Army was defending herself, not attacking. Then again, it was quite impossible that so little country as Finland, contra quite unlikely supremacy of Soviets, with the Red Army outnumbering the whole population of Finland, could have any chance. Angus supposed, that however the fight brave, they may hold out a week more, at the top two weeks.

The second juicy item was the news about a naval battle near Montevideo. It cost Germany one heavy mailed cruiser of latest generation, England too had severe losses, but these ships were smaller and older. Pleasant news, but not much important; anyway, Angus never considered, Germans may have any chance fighting the British Fleet. All the rot about the superhuman bravery of the German, valor of the German commander and success was sweet sweating of the bitter pill. But, even in Hitler lost a ship every week, this was not enough to effect capitulation.

He destroyed the newspapers. The news being not important, he wanted not give mother nerves shoving her vile papers, in fact neither to anyone else.

Already coming back, he committed a capital discovery, finding on the Kiliński Street an open public library for youth, the library of the „Macierzy Szkolnej”. The already mentioned in Chapter 1, Macierz Polska (Polish Matrix), at the times of Poland in slavery, was a secret organization dedicated to improving education of children. Next in the free Poland, Macierz Szkolna continued the task. Once there, he got a second address of TCL library (Society of People’s Reading Rooms). In both libraries he got acceptance and a reader cart. On the strength of it could without more formalities, easy take the books. What’s more, he paid only a small bail for one book, but could get several. The reason of this he knew from Poznań, like in his town, also here all Polish libraries were on the brink of annihilation. Yet in GG the formalities took longer, the Germans began their reign from other task. The action of destroying the books was not of the first importance. For Angus this was the best luck in the last month. The only better could be only, if he could take active part in resistance, but here and now there was zero of a chance. At least he could get some comfort from reading, while expecting the final victory.

He returned to the hospital with a reserve of spiritual provision and for a few days in accord with the external world. It was only a few days and some borrowed books later, that he came on a book that determined his further life. In fact, it was not one book, but rather a series of weekly sold booklets: the novel of Ms. Buyano-Arctowa, the title being „The Isle of wise men”, from the category of scientific fantasy.

Angus already read such books, mentioning only these by Julius Verne. Nevertheless, this one was for him a true revelation. It contains some fragments congenial, outdating his era. But, certainly isn’t "tout mature", on the top all the time. It includes also moments flat, round the mill, mushy and boring fragments. In fact, it should be worked over, a first-class material needing careful correction. Only by using elimination, like redactor scissors this could turn into an exquisite literary work, rating better, that a wide category at the time. (The scientific fantasy developed and present-day there are many novels of superior standard).

For Angus, this book amounted to opening of a new universe, because the good, for him the best in whole literature fragments in full details responded to his dreams. Daydreams not proper developed yet which he only presumed but was not able to envisage. In short, all, which he could not see in his mind, but exact conceding with his brain-paths: the world of wonderful, dazzling discoveries.

For him this book allowed to draw up a whole, uniform vision on a world created and showed by the power of human mind: the knowledge, science and spirit. All what happened on earth, at least regarding human race, first comes to virtual existence in brain. Only then, by method of trying and after many mistakes, it copies into realty. Development of mind and spirit created progress, yet the new conceptions may perish in experiments and by “reductio ad absurdum”. Some had the possibilities, but did not agree with the contemporary mental possibility, may be premature, but after many years came back. Some became a natural part of life in spite that at the beginning met disbelief. Some evolved even more, creating new ways.

One new solution may add more to the history of the humanity that won or lost battles, wars. With several of them, or only with one, but important it would be possible to change the world contra the great armies and the kings or great leaders. The book supplied many ideas of such great discoveries; solution of one only would be enough. But to his regrets he only now noticed, how bad is his foundation, knowledge, how great depths of ignorance he has to pass over.

Angus finished only five class of the preparatory school (not too bad, considering that at his age he should only now begin the fifth class). He learned yet neither physic, nor chemistry and nothing about technique. In the fifth class as a now task (subject), the boys began the so-called calm nature study, meaning some phenomena of the dead nature, an introduction to chemistry and physics. More knowledge, than from the school, he picked up by reading the popular-scientific books for youths. Also some shallow and profane books, at best allowing for society conversations between playboys and fair ladies, were making impression or rather keeping up the appearances, as if the person talking knew anything about the matter.

From an early child age, Angus, just curious, asked never-ending questions. Next remained an interest, how they make allthings possible, from the betony, bricks, glass and iron to more processed products, flour, fabrics, fuel, electricity, anything. In fact it was an enchilada of vague fragments of information, with a deep vacuum between. For example, the best source of info was the intelligent if already outdated books of Sprague de Camp; like “The history of discoveries” and “…of inventions” and “The great creators of civilization”. Well, even the vintage “History of the candle” by Faraday. Also many pseudoscientific or -technical articles, from the periodic like “Tęcza” (the Rainbow) or books of scientific-sensation type like “Boczna antena” (aside aerial) by Bruno Winawer. Finally, small pieces of information as for example the mentioned fragments about hydroponics’ culture of plants from books of Bertrand Russell. To take it short, it was nothing systematic, rather a scrap heap, garbage dump of information.

Anyway he hoped, this leftover of information might someday be useful, if only occasionally. Already in Podłoziny, he tried to tempt his uncle with the hydroponics plant production. In secret, he planned some other experiments, for example find some chap fuel, calcify and produce lime and cement, maybe of the type known in ancient Rome. Next build a watch turret or maybe a top nest like on ships, on one of the big, massive trees, maybe secret recess too. As many children, he daydreamed of many such projects, for example making binoculars from lens (he already make the drawing), tan skins for leather and make original moccasins etc. But he couldn’t find a coworker, and single play is boring. So he shifted the projects for later.

No need to explain, that all the projects has similar worth, as the tiger spring of Mao. It would be changing the industrial production, well, not even back to manufacture level, not even to craftsman work, because craftsmen got first knowledge and experience as apprentices, but rather with, using he old vocabulary, plain bungling.

Now, it was another kettle of fish. He needed knowledge, scholarship to create the great inventions. Then, arranging them, as the occasion arises, he could wrestle down the bad enemy, Hitler of his succeeds, wrestle down the bad and alter the world. If next a second Hitler should appear, he would not have a chance.

To start with, he must order systematically these scraps of information he already has, orient himself, what are the empty places between them and substitute them with knowledge. He never doubted that with satisfactory education, he shall solve any technical problem, this was a simple result of following experience: in all popular-scientific books, he was always able to guess the further progress, the direction it would take. That was right, but Angus was not aware, that these books try to show the logical outcome of progress, try to present this logical wise, as plain as a nose on your face. The inner logic and the basic facts relation are visible only “post factum” and not before, when these facts were yet not cleared and predicted.

Just the same, he had to start with something. He decided for the beginning to buy in a bookseller shop the next handbook for the sixth and seventh class for physics. There he can find some elementary information about electricity and magnetism with drawings of the appliances, motors and dynamos. On the strength of this, he was ready to make his first inventions. The next shall follow when he learns more, he bought only some more exercise-books, pencils and eraser.

It is only natural, that Angus was an unsophisticated simpleton, a boy in a children age. At the 8-th October, the day of the predicted miracle, which should tip the war and restore Poland by the Saint Virgin Mother of Good grace, he still lacked twenty days to be eleven and a half years old. Anyway, a naive trust in own power and ability is not a serious fault, a sign of plain stupidity. The assumption was, he had much to learn and better to cut his teeth into the science speedy, losing not a second, but he may as well try while doing so, by the way plan some inventions. These efforts may, or not be successful, anyway he had nothing to lose, even so this would condition him better for the future

His older colleague in the future trade, Edison, too started early, well, already as a small child and he had much imagination and none knowledge or learning, this came later picked on the way. Angus no way had any doubt in his potential, he hoped not be any worse. He had none inferiority complex, nor too much of the natural modesty.

He read all the textbooks urgently nonstop a couple of days and began to draw. Unable to make any calculations or math account, it was the only way to plan the future innovations. Angus main interest lay with armored machines and especially their motors, supplying large volume of energy, almost without limits. To say it short a "perpetuum mobile". The reason was simple. Angus had not a bloody notion about the fundamental principle of conserving the energy, not to mention the second principle of thermodynamics, that only spreading, not concentrating the energy is possible. Seeing the drawings of the typical motors, dynamos, commutators and other electric appliances, he imagined their way of acting only qualitatively, not quantitatively.

Well, he knew that nobody succeeded yet a construction of "perpetuum mobile", but this did not convince him that it remains impossible in the future. In the second principle of thermodynamics, he did not believe at all. If anything may spread, it should be possible to concentrate as well. In the history many projects people called impossible to the time, till someone solved the problem. So why could it not be him? Now go on to work, if it is him who may succeed the task, there is not time to lose.

From this moment, not only during stay in the hospital but in next month’s, especially next winter, he projected, figured out and drew miscellaneous types of “perpetuum mobile”, beginning from the simple to more complex. On the drawings, all looked reasonably well; he hoped, only one effective would be enough.

The most simple based on arranging so the vectors of force, according to the well known graphics that the end result changed, finally appeared pairs of vectors not amounting to the primary value. Or the pair had different places of applying, which would result in rotation. In another projects he wanted make use of the gravity, or the thrust resulting from the electric or magnetic attraction, in his ignorance unaware, the action is symmetric, met by exactly equal counteraction. In his fantasies, one object could by attract another, but the former not the first. This, if they would be attached or placed on a common axis, would affect one side pressure or spontaneous movement of the whole combination.

Angus took too strong interest in possible construction of a magnetic mono- pole. He read that such a device could not exist; the magnetic pole came ever in pairs. Nevertheless, he imagined a long magnet, the poles conducted by a long iron wire. Such a construction may produce energy at the cost of the global magnetic field. Certainly not a true "perpetuum mobile", but it should make possible produce some energy like a little water taken from almost never-ending ocean. Only, what may be the yield, would the expense be worth it? Again, he had not a bloody notion, how calculate or figure this out.

Another project was to produce intelligent ammunition by adding before the bullet a small aerodynamic wing, like the great procedures installed on some planes. The aerofoil installed before the fuselage, they called this steering by configuration of a duck. It could direct the shot to one side. If steering by radio signal would be too complex, the simplified variant would be shooting not straight, but after radial curve. For example, a machine gun cold fire behind a barrier with the bullets evading this, or shoot point-blank, but the bullet changing the direction would imitate an effect a flanking fire. The small steering aerofoil could be set constant and it would be possible to project a viewfinder allowing calculate deflecting the bullets. The last possibility, rather simple, would be to achieve a more flat, leveled up ballistic curve of the bullets, probably better targeting at great distances. Obviously to achieve this effect, the frontal part, the head of the bullet should not rotate. Angus estimated several simple devices, but without experiments could not decide, which way may be the best.

Agreed, the review of these and many similar projects is a waste of time, the merger of fantasy with ignorance. Nevertheless, it directed Angus way of thinking. Beginning in the hospital, Angus continued this to the end of winter, during this time, filled three draft-books with hundreds of sketches, and only then make the first and only experiment, shattering his hopes. He measured on scales separately the weight of a piece of iron, magnet and the notebook. Next of the iron and magnet, separated by the notebook in different combinations, Alas, all the variation gave the same result. The combined weight of the objects together was exactly equal the sum of items, there was not the slightest difference. If there would be any, he could still hope may be a stronger magnet is necessary. However, as it was, he assumed, in his theory something is wrong, sorry indeed.

In fact, he still has to learn much. Nevertheless, for a time, Angus preserved, keeping it in secret all the notebooks and finally destroyed them personally. Maybe among the drawings remained a rough diamond needing only some refinement, but he is too stupid to notice this. If these books would fell in undesired hands (for example during an arrest or revision), some enemy could make use of his ideas to a bad purpose.

Nevertheless, this task left a deep imprint in Angus psyche and spirit. It determined his second and third life (this expression meaning a further way of life, after almost dying, but not completely).

At the same time, Angus made a discovery of another type, to be exact on his body. The long days in bed switched between screens in the infirmary afraid to sleep, awaiting when his mother may speak, the nerves, this all caused that seeking any distraction, he began to watch his body, explore his reflexes.

In fact, Angus was still unripe sexually, prudent and unconscious of the matter. Living in town, he had not the opportunity to watch the nature, the animals. His parents, especially the mother strong prohibited any unsuitable society, dirty talks, and vulgar words. To be sure, allowed not straight talk and unsuitable books or papers. In fact, he conquered the family dispute in case of the personal right to read anything without a supervision and control. Yet sex remained a taboo because parents explained to him that it is a sin and he was very religious, in fact overzealous. Once he asked his colleague how the babies are born (and honest, the asked had only trash information, mostly false). Angus parents demanded an investigation in the school, a compromising and unpleasant trial. Afterwards, the parents told him a little of how the embryo grows inside his mother, but was a misinformation; so as a man had nothing to do with this phenomena.

That’s why Angus with wonder noted rather special reaction of his sex organs, without any association neither with reproduction, nor any other roles between man and woman. He was not physiologically mature for masturbation, only for erection but was not even sure, if the effects pleased him or not, was just curious. This was just the beginning, the interest remained in future.

After not a full week, the situation changed. Mother got better and adapted to the hospital, began to feel at home and got contact with other patients. There was on need for him to care about her all the time. He had no more cold in his head, would not spread the microbes. At least, he could go to the wounded yeomen.

 Capsule: The field hospital in Ostrowiec and the wounded soldiers.

The first rather timid visit to the wounded heroes on the upper flours consisted of a quick walk. Angus asked repeatedly, may he be of any help, maybe by reading aloud, or fetch something, or sit a while and only talk. Some said no, some yes; so the first contacts and links connected.

In a few days, he already knew everyone by sight and spent there every moment, with exception of the meals and sleeping time. Many soldiers he knew more intimate, by rank-and-file, including theirs former history from the beginning of war to arrival to the hospital.

On the second floor from the stairway opened on both sides central corridors and of both sides of them appeared sickrooms with all door open too. The same arrangement on both sides of the stairs, it was like two great halls with many rooms like side pockets. On the third floor alike, such establishment remained from the days, as during the war-days the hospital overcrowded with soldiers. Not a scrap of the floors left free, but now on the attic with a mansard roof it was fewer of the wounded, some already transferred to the second floor and into a few small rooms returned the offices. Now in the field hospital remained only about tree hundreds of soldiers and the number dwindled to about two hundred at the end of the year. No wonder, it was already third month from start of the war. As for a field hospital the building was not much overcrowded, but in comparison to the before the war status and the destination project yes.

In the dock was not one officer, only soldiers, rather simple people. The injured officers and some warrant officers transferred to somewhere else and after recovering fell over to the POW camps. That is, if they vanished not from the hospital latest to the end of September, the quick thinking did exactly this.

Anyway, even the sergeants copied corporals, the corporals the privates and so on, one grade below to be sure. The Germans had not much interest for ordinary soldiers, from the hospital they could return home. In the hospital remained up to now the worst cases, the mortality would be already low. Nevertheless, many of them disabled and not fit for work, if transported to Germany, there would be only problems with them. Many a human tragedy, the invalids wished neither show his face anymore nor see his spouses, wanted not show themselves to their families.

The records of these people were similar: all conscripted already during the war. The reserve Army “Prusy” was exactly one of these, which fate so badly affected the delay in mobilization, on demand of the allies. The diplomatic intervention in common by British and French ambassadors on 26-th of August should be a conciliatory gesture to Hitler. This proved the most idiotic, suicidal notion. Army “Prusy” should be ready and concentrated at the ninth day of the mobilization, on the 9-th of September. Instead, it declined already on 6-th of September, before about half of people arrived and got the arms, not mentioning the heavy weapons, scare indeed. Already before, the proxies of the Commander in Chief, facing a crisis, took out some detached troops from the only forming Army to protect the western approaches. These detached troops managed for a few days rather satisfactory. The attacking Germans paid at first a heavy toll, but next the Light Speedy Mailed Corps of Gen Hoth outrun on the motors the Polish infantry of Army Krakow. Then turned north in the gap between Polish Army Krakow and Army Łódź, retreating in divergent directions. Now the situation became desperate, not only Army “Prusy” became a Front Army before ready. In fact, the Light Speedy Mailed Corps took position direct at their back, blocking the way of retreat.

The improvised defense from the west site held unexpectedly well, the detached troops with some ad hoc added relief of volunteers stopped temporary the Germans. But, the competition between motors and infantry, as usual, ended fatally for the men. Gen Hoth, whose name with time got famous, took Ostrowiec Świętokrzyski and Opatów. In days of 8-th and 9-th of September the battle in the Iłża and Starachowice forests came to its end. The cut off Polish troops tried to enforce his retreat to the Vistula River, but only a few loose troops and individual soldiers succeeded. The Poles, almost barren of heavy weapons were harmless to the German tanks and vans with motorized troops. The lion part of the wounded came to harm in the Iłża forest on the day of 8-th September. The transports came from the 8-th to the 12, some even to the 15 of September.

The civic hospital expanded to a Field Hospital. Already days before there cured some wounded both soldiers and civilest, but after 8-th September, it changed into a bloody hell. It accepted over eight hundreds of the wounded, some said, at the peak it were 850. There was no place, no beds for them, never mentioning treatment. The state of affairs saved the loyal help of community. Many people brought beds, supplies and different appliances, anything necessary. All doctors, nurses, even medicine students volunteered and many men and women offered his help to the personnel. The numbers changed as the lightly wounded went further and the serious died, but on the other side, the new continued to arrive.

People said that in September the hospital contained up to 600 wounded soldiers, what to Angus seemed almost impossible. In comparison, now after months the housing and care was comfortable enough, that is as for a field hospital. If surely not up to the standards of a civic hospital and to the projected capacity, which in the pace time was several times fewer.

The soldiers had a high opinion about the director of the hospital, although some thought, Ms Dr Brandt rules dictatorial, arbitrary and with haste and high assurance. It may be so, on the other side, she sure had everything in a hollow of her hand, never seeking a soft way for himself. In fact, she was as much demanding from her as from others.

In the critical time, she got the hospital trough and this was the mainthing, not many could be so effective. All the professional men, the surgeons and doctors deserved the high praise fair and right. After an exhausting, hectic training, days and nights performing surgery, until they dropped by the tables, from this hospital came out a group of exquisite professionals. Especially the surgeons after the war got high positions, university chairs and capital reputation in Poznań, Warsaw and others.

Alas, many lasted not to the end of war, did not survive. This concerns especially the Jews, who between the volunteers’ doctors for a time represented a majority. Ostrowiec Świętokrzyski had a high percentage of Jewish population and between the medicine men the Jews were in majority. However, when Angus came there, the Jewish volunteers already had to leave, the hospital management could not oppose the German ruling, it would be plain madness.

The birds told, that even Ms Dr Brandt was of a mixed blood, after the Nuremberg Racial Laws she should be considered unfit to the position in the hospital. At the time, nobody imagined yet the more serious dangers. In fact, between the wounded soldiers and in the chamber with civil patients were also some Jews. Yet now neither German control, nor anybody else took any interest, there was none separation or segregation, all touched by the same bad luck and woe.

The only what noticed Angus, was the specific slang, although it was not the classic Yiddish. (A category of old German, mostly formed in the Dark Ages, which in the Middle Centuries brought with themselves the Jewish elopers from the most of Europe, seeking asylum in Poland). This old tongue remaining with a few changes in the original, anachronism form, survived many next centuries. In Poland it become common, as here never existed any discrimination or pressure against using foreign or unfamiliar languages in public, as in Hitler’ Germany. (Also before in the former German Empire before the 1914 y. and in contemporary Russia occasionally it could be dangerous to speak aloud in Yiddish; the same in late Stalin area).

Angus never heard Yiddish in Poznań, settled in by few Jews, but had many occasions to hear it during vacations, especially in the little towns of east and south part of Poland. He did not understand it at all, or the German language, but noticed the compatible, related sounds, which to him seemed almost the same. With the murder of Polish Jews and in fact almost all European Jewry, the Yiddish became now a dead or dying language. It may be in use now only between a few traditionalist living in US, but curious enough, exactly after the WW II erupted an imposing literature thanks to these epigone writers.

But besides this, in his memory remained a rare exotic mixture of Yiddish, containing much Polish, sometimes a few Byelorussian or Ukrainian words.

Seemingly, the evolution of Yiddish developed not by change o the language exactly, because Yiddish remained in the shape of the old, medieval German, at least so said Angus’ mother. Rather it changed by addition of polish words, probably alike words of other languages too. Such mixture of words and languages happened so often, that sometimes appeared not only in the daily talk, but also in the print, in the daily press. For example, about two years before the war, when on vacation in Druskienniki, in Angus hands fell a daily newspaper. They edited it in Yiddish, nevertheless there were fragments containing many Polish words, as in the following verse, (he still remembered the beginning):

- Die łyżwes myt der kułkies

- to jest ein feines sport

- da łames rękes, nogies

- und auch die kepeł dort.

- Tam Tate wraz z małżonką,

- bachores mit der tant...

Angus didn’t remember any more. His mother knowing German language explained to him the matter, it was a yoke, a comic entertainment verse about roller-skates.

- The skates with wheels

- It is a fine sport

- You can break an arm, a leg

- Or even a head there.

- There Father with a spouse,

- The children with their aunt….

Exotic or now, such composed texts are the swiftest way to learn and understand languages. The modern linguists and teachers should try the old and natural way, exactly like the children do, mixing words and learning quickly. It could become even more effective by introducing this pattern in the printed matter, books and newspapers. Of gripping and attractive, the most interesting fragments and in the audio- and audiovisual data step-by-step by increase percentage of alien words and phrases. This way the learning could progress smoothly with no barriers at all. Sure, it would give only a quick understanding, not the correct use, there would be necessary a further study, exactly as it happens with children.

To be sure in Hospital Angus never heard a straight Yiddish; anyway, he could not distinguish it from German, knowing neither the old nor the new variant of the tongue. What more, he never heard the mixture of words. Difficult to say, if this was causally or because of too few contacts, but the person he met talked a good Polish, only sometimes with a poor grammar. Anyway, this was nothing extraordinary between rather simple people. Only sometimes there was a distinctly difference in the grammar, the peasants speaks another way, he was not aware of meeting a Jew. One of the poor fellows spoke rather indistinctly Polish words, but with an untypical own grammar: “Signora Doctor, me must not bite this, me don’t have the teeth”.

In fact the injured soldier lost not only the teeth, but a great part of yaw, and the he was able to speak betrayed a good skill of the surgeon, who operated. Still, the soldier had to eat permanently only soft mash.

The point is, now the TV and wireless made the talk uniform, however as well simultaneously impoverished it. At these times, there were many little differences and Angus only just started to distinguish them. This unlucky invalid with indistinct talk made little, but characteristic lingual differences and variances. However, they exactly taught Angus to notice this. Only after this acquaintance, Angus could recognize several Jews among the wounded and some patients of the civil chamber where lay Angus mother and he. But the point was, he also played well chess, much too good for Angus. There was never a question of equal chances even with big initial concessions for Angus, only of a master coaching an inadequate student.

What concerns the personnel and the volunteers, like the voluntary surgeons, all Jews already pulled out after the worst period came over. It become obvious, it would be better carefully minds any problems with the occupants. Also all the male Polish volunteers vanished, only the female remained and worked still with a full devotion, one might say, didn’t give a damn about themselves. They came from different societies, some of them genuine great ladies on special status. Nevertheless, they took commands not only from the doctors, but also from the nurses and all the professional personnel of lower ranks. They accepted doing any of the unsavory duty. On the other side, the soldiers preferred the help of simple folk women, and especially contested the help of the regular order sisters. It’s anyone guess, why, they were top of the top, as one may say, shone with insight and tried best they could. Maybe the soldiers feel embarrassed in their presence, or maybe they presence reminded about the second life after death. This is a theme most of the soldiers want better to forget for a time.

Angus too offered his help (as for example with supplying the so-called “ducks” – meaning covered urinals for the wounded), but shortly discovered there is little demand. There already existed a fixed routine of common relief between the invalids. Demand for reading also was low, even the play with checkers was not especially popular, although he found some partners and won the matches, gaining a good opinion. Unexpectedly, most of the soldiers played chess. This developed in a local specialty. In fact, about half of patient got some raving madness about this game, although the greater number was only on the first step of early apprenticeship. With beginners who learned the game only in this hospital, the level was not soaring high and with luck, Angus had a chance. He already played occasionally with his cousins in Podłoziny, but seldom because the older boys wanted not as partner a kid, who only knew to move the figures and little more. Such occasions in a year, he could count on his fingers.

However here he differed from the standards not so badly that given a handicap of one, against good players' two figures (except, a queen, to be sure) he cold just touched the strife. Well, he more often loosed as wined, but this was not a point against him. Later, as he already began play better, he sometime loosed on purpose, to humor his opponents. Moreover, with constant practice (he often played with a sweat on his brow from dawn to the evening) he sure made progress. He began the daily tour causally from any room and if some soldier gave a nick of head, he lost several games and worked his way further until the dinner. Then the next chamber or even floor and so on, before bedtime, usually he lost umpteen games and won a few. Gradually the games became longer and more interesting and he still remembered losing more often, as winning. He found more willing to play, as much as he could and sometimes more, had to reserve the time for next day.

Occasionally meanwhile he impelled the partners to some talk, to hear their war memories. With time, he became as familiar as trivial utensils in the room, so they freely discussed not only the war experiences, what interested Angus most, but also sometimes their whole lives. Angus silent worshipped them, the genuine heroes who shed his blood and paid a heavy toll. Everyone appeared worth more than teens of such little stinkers as himself, only dreaming but not adequate to fight for his country.

However, right away began a more important business, as chess or even memoirs. The injured in better health, which could already move (and finally, the plurality was already as much fit, as could be expected, if they could heal at all) prepared a great Christmas performance. This project now had top priority, the authors and the actors engaged and involved deeply, read and learned they parts, debated fragments. It was a dead secret, a scheme private and emotional, but they accepted Angus treating him as a steady factor, like a part of chamber furniture or chessboard.

Some of them, for the matter considered the task not serious, took none interest neither in the creative work, nor in performance like a child play. Angus could understand both sides. They had bad luck, a clean washout before they could think what is happening. Before their life could begin it already ended, whatever they wanted to achieve became impossible, all dreams unreal. Many did not write to their families, delaying the moment, when the wife shall see an invalid with no arm or leg, or an unfamiliar ugly face. Maybe, the mother will be happy if her son returns at all, never mind the hand or foot. But the parents on their old years should have solaces by a son in his prime, not care further for him. Would the children dread on the sight of their father? In short, they preferred that home the family should wait for them further, than it should survive a shock and commiserate them.

Temporary they were between themselves. The field hospital, whatever one could say, become their haven and home, where to the best of one’s capacity they could survive, sleep in some corner and find board. Even more important as anything the doctors could do for them was, that around them were similar to them unlucky men. Together in a group, it was difficult to say, whose fate was the worst, which is the worst calamity. To say it short, here they not only got the care and medicine for the body wounds, but the mental balance. And now the field hospital advanced to liquidation, the time ended and the moment came, when they had to say “Bye, Bye” and go, even if still not ready. Some part of the wounded soldiers wanted much to go home as soon as possible, whereas some panicked and would if possible, never leave, they expected nothing good “there”. “Here” they were not better off and expected not a better fate, but the others around them were similar unlucky and anyone could find someone, in comparison with whom he could consider himself in better luck.

In fact, one of the chess partners asked Angus about his experiences and after Angus told him shortly, he commented:

- How much would you demand for his eye, hand or leg? Or how much would be a kidney? - And afterwards, to keep up his spirit, added: - “Never mind the material loss; as long as you have all his body complete, you may consider yourself a rich man. Many of the wounded would be happy to swap his fate with any poor beggar, indeed”.

Angus, to be sure, did not need this remark; he anyway never despaired.

Just the same, the Christmas Eve ended with a triumph, after the supper the “Szopka” (Christmas performance) took several hours. The last great accent, especially because all performers had to leave the hospital, which should became again the civic Community Insurance Hospital. The leaving soldiers recollected all detailed, both the bad and good moments, most of the achievements. This was not a question of gratitude, in fact they wanted to keep up the spirit, singing when going away:

".....Wzniesiemy sztandar do góry!
Bodajby nikt nie doczekał
Powrócić w szpitalne mury!"

".....heave-ho! Rise the banner!
Let never again return
into the hospital walls!

The next two days was the most hectic term, which Angus stood ever at the chessboard, some creasy nonstop marathon. There was much talk, but neutral, mostly about the performance, about its wheels within wheels. None talked about future, none spoke about his plans and none said – “Farewell “. As if the time stopped.

The sledges pulled by a horse, glided along a deep gulley in the snow. By one of the high snow walls, formed from the rejected snow, run a path meant for pedestrians. They were strong orders to hold the way passable and the snow pushed off, on the path, the snow was simply trampled down, placed higher. Anyway, the snow cover was not equal, but with local banks and substantial drifts. The main way in a deep excavation lay straight and empty, but the path got trough tunnels with a roof of snow overhead. The deep frost and uncommon heavy snowfalls caused, that external life stopped, nobody walked outside, unless having an exceptional important cause.

Anyway, the day was half-free, Saturday after the Christmas. The winter was in contemporary Poland a lazy season, the tempo of life took down. There was not much of work, time for long sleep, leisure and regeneration, the strength would be again necessary in spring. “Let only the apple trees bloom again!…” The people lived more adapted to nature, no bidden business, nothing by force. Angus, living in big town, did not share this rhythm, but on the country, such unsophisticated order was in accord with natural functions of human organism. In the small towns, it was about the middle: The activity dwindled, but not too much, there would be more rest and entertainment.

Especially this year when the winter came so fierce and rapid, the best course was to stay home, supposing the person had enough of wood for fire and could sit warmly by the furnace, making no exit. Supposing there was enough provision. Following this, they rode alone; the sledge met no other carriage and no pedestrians. With the cart-man, urging the only one, but crafty horse, traveled two people, a woman and a biggish boy with several parcels of baggage.

- Close your mouth and breathe by nose, or you may get pneumonia – responded mother to every Angus’ question. – You may talk, as we arrive and for the matter, you shall see it all. -

It all was, one may say, as a surprise. Mother already yesterday made an excurse from the hospital. To be exact, it was the second time, but before it was only for a few moments, and yesterday a whole half a day. Today again she vanished for some hours, telling Angus nothing, explaining no plans. Only now it became clear, that she took a “dorojka” (passenger cab), or rather a sledge, because the cabdriver changed the wheels to skids (runner) and they toured the vicinity, searching for rooms to let. Downtown it was a hard work, all places already taken earlier by the many refuges. Luckily mother reasoned good and proper that with all the schools closed, they shall be empty places, normally housing (booking in) the youth. He told the cabdriver to visit the same places, where every year he rode with parents, who escorted their children to schools and sought for them homes to live, when not attending the classes. Well, mother was already herself again. The hospital probably saved her life and the quiet recess without stress recovered mental balance, but they could not live there forever.

Ostrowiec Świętokrzyski contained before the war several high schools, including two "gymnasiums and lyceums" (colleges). The people living in the country around in villages, the squires, well-to do peasants, inhabitants of small towns, in short everybody who cold bears the expense brought here the children for further tuition. The percentage of young’s continuing education after the elementary school was different, but in the least years about 20-25 % in average. Now if the children lived not too far-off, there was no problem, they could take a walk or ride a bicycle. Some went daily in a cab; a few arrived riding a so called “linijka”, which was a small bank on wheels, pulled by a horse. However, that was a small minority. The normal course would be to seek accommodation for the children in the nearby houses. The hosts and especially their women detached one, or several rooms for a small youth hostel, called a “stancja”. Rarely one pupil would take a room alone, usually there housed several. They ate the common rations with the family of host and temporary remained in his care, exactly as the members of family. The remunerations for such a place to live varied consistently with the standards. At minimum it would be 30 – 40 Zł, maximum up to 100 Zł, in average 50 – 60 Zł. The feed was simple, but ample and sustaining, because in Poland the supplies were cheap. For example on breakfast it would instead of meat be dairy, the cheese and eggs, often a soup of the local specialty, “zalewajka”, which, or milk could everyone take as much as he pleased.

Usually the parent locating their child in such hostel, trusted the host with pedagogic functions, the host or host' wife were “in loco parentis” (in place of parents). Often the father leaving announced loudly, that if the need arises, he allows the hosts apply a sound beating to his son. Obviously, this was only a void, empty declaration, nothing doing; no host would consider this seriously. In fact, the older and especially well-to do boys let the host not direct themselves and often overexploited the position of the valuable paying-quest. Because of this, in fact too much leniency, the schools, at least theoretically, should supervise the youth hostels and usually the parents in addition pleaded also for the control of the parish. It was nominal supervision; the teacher of the class obliged to visit every hostel twice a year and the parish rector did so usually once, after Christmas. Nevertheless if this was mere a formality, the opinion counted, the parents, especially the newly incoming went for information to the schools and often to parish, where may they gave with a full trust to place their children. That being so, the hostel hosts and their wives in own interest took pains to deserve for a good opinion both of the school and the parish.

The roadway to Starachowice took a left turn and entered the woods, about two hundred meters onward on the left bank was the Gimnazjum’ “bursa” (boardinghouse for students). Even before, exactly at the turn, to the right branched off the “Piaski” (Sands) Street. The word Street may be too much; it was a wide thoroughfare on one side on the fridge of forest. There started lately a construction of a new church. Some distance after lay the house, garden and a leftover of a former squire estate. On the other side in succession stood the houses of former inhabitant of the hamlet, the peasants. In addition, clerks and employees of the Town or the Ostrowiec Ironworks that preferred to live a short distance from the town and build their houses on their own ground. These houses differed, majority was two-level but some one-level and generally parallel to the street but the gardens sometimes got wide into the street. Some had front gardens, some not. Anyway, such was the first impression, because in the deep snow it would be impossible to distinguish the border, only if the fences were high, they were visible over the snow.

The greater from the two Ostrowiec Colleges, housed in representative, big and up-to-date, new building by a roadway near the border of town at the West side. The location was well chosen, much room to yards, playgrounds and for the possible, future expansion. Exactly opposite they build a great elementary school that would contain the pupils of several former small. Around this a stood only few houses. But first, a walk or cycling on the fresh air is very good for the youth, and second a little distance about the east was erected from the community means the mentioned “bursa”. Meaning a cheap boardinghouse intended for the poorer students (preferably from the higher classes), which could comfortably contain about 50 places, less comfortably even more. This was not enough, but still the “bursa” had a best influence and example for the many little “stancja” (private youth hostels).

The sleights stopped before a tall fence from densely placed timber planks, which converged the street. Portal and wicket were closed, but at the sound of bell and loud bay of a hound, acting as an amplifier, from the house came out a person. She was a woman in a green woolen, head and shoulders shawl and she opened the wicket assisting Angus’ mother by wooden steps to the hall. After them, the cabdriver helped with the baggage and left. The host wife took of the warm wrap and opened one of the two opposite doors in the hall, not mentioning the steps leading on the next floor and they stepped into the kitchen. This was alighted by an electric lamp and stove flames, visible by the metal uppermost closing with round openings, although the twilight not much advanced yet and both the window and the lamp supplied light.

The host wife proposed, the newcomers may start with sightseeing their room, taking of the warm closes and washing, and meanwhile she prepares the supper. The room was direct behind the kitchen stove with doors almost touching it. The after wall of the stove from ceramic files warmed the room rather small and despite the sharp frost outside rather warm; too warm, they had to air it. Rectangular, it had only 14 meters squares, before the war was let to two students and now seemed ample for the mother with her son with very little baggage. Painted white and furnished poor, but sufficiently, it contained two bunks, clothing store, small table with a pair of chairs and a washstand with a basin and two buckets, one with pure and one for dirty water. More water stored in two containers standing on an undersized bank in the kitchen, came from a well on the yard, enclosed and provided with a windlass and a chain with suspended pail. The dirty water had to be disposed off to manure heap behind a fence, on the brink of vegetable garden.

The whole site consisted from the yard with the house, then the economy buildings, bakery, a cell with wood for fuel, a laundry, cowshed, stable and a small dwelling (stay) for the care of two pigs. Next, they were a low fence with a wicket, entry to the vegetable garden ending at the manure, the next one, high fence around a large orchard. Overall, it was an oblong terrain some 50 x 250 m, the yard and vegetable garden almost square, and after the detached orchard, some 150m or more long. The people cultivated it only recently, the fruit trees didn’t yet bear fruits. The house stood turned sideways to the road, oriented to east (all the other houses by the street were oriented to the street, south) with the entry from the yard, via the wooden stairs and a porch into a hall. The host lived in the flat on the left side, all the family life concentrated in the kitchen, with the fire lit in winter the whole day. In other seasons, it burned twice a day, mornings and as well at the moon.

On arrival, Angus presented himself to the host wife, Ms. Mary Misior as well as her two daughters: Violet, in age of 11 years and the seven y. Anisia. Afterwards mother told him just after they got familiar with the new housing and laid down his belongings to hop into bed, because he may catch a cold after the journey in the deep frost. In the least time, he got soft in the hospital and didn’t walk on fresh air at all. Even the supper, hot milk, village bread with butter (haversack) and scrambled eggs, Angus ate in bunk, when mother explained to Ms. Misior, that they are not squeamish about food and a similar breakfast would be quite satisfactory. Thereupon Angus at rest could read a book, but the door to the kitchen remained open and the conversation of the women continued. He occasionally also stocked in his three pence (a few words).

Finally rode on a wagon, the householder at first brought into the buildings the sacks with cereals and other goods, then span out the horse and provided for it and only least came into the kitchen for supper. He washed very aloud and thoroughly in a special large washstand, mounted ad hoc in the center of the kitchen. Fatigued and probably cold, he talked little, only walking he tatted loudly with his right, wooden leg. Ian Misior disabled, in fact a war invalid, lost his leg and won a medal for courage in 1921-year in the war with Soviets.

The family of Misior left behind a term of a boom, to the warfare they prospered well. The house and all they had was an effect of own work with a proper hand, they began exactly from zero (scratch). Not only diligent, they worked with sense, it seemed as if they stepped already on stable way of a success, but the war ended this prospect tragically.

Ian Misior was a youngster of poor peasants without own soil, but at least he choose well and wisely his birth term. Too young for the WW I, he was exactly right and ready to volunteer to the army to defend their motherland at the critical time of Soviet offensive in y. 1920. He acted on the appeal of the popular peasant leader Witos. As a true peasant son he was strong and vehement, young and fearless, fought brave without caring about danger to himself.

"A na wojnie świszczą kule, lud się wali niby snopy.

A najdzielniej biją króle, a najgęściej giną chłopy."

(At the war, buzz the bullets, populace fall down like the sheaves,

toughest fight the kings and most often perish the peasants)

To be sure, he survived, but lost one leg. By his own words (as understood, Angus would left him never in rest, till he heard not a short summary): “The rapid-fire from the machine guns was ample, but the aim rather low, so we run as speedy as we could straight on. It was not worth to fall on the ground, better get the bullet in the leg than in the head”.

The crippled in war invalids got very little pension, not a full hundred of zł, the State, devastated by the WW I and more so by the Soviet war, had poor income and there were lots in need. The front several times rolled over Poland, the terrain being open it tempted every conqueror for centuries and the chest of the defenders sometimes proved not sufficient defenses.

But it was in some part compensated by a concession for selling alcohol beverages (the monopoly for alcohol drinks was binding for any drinks stronger than 4,5 %). Under the law, concession for trafficking could get only people with impeachable an opinion. This should guarantee that consuming alcohol takes place in conditions wise as well as proper and virtuous preserving the law. Such order principle seems sound and reasonable, it could be better observed today. Anyway, it was only keeping up the appearances. It was effective only in keeping off the juveniles from the alcohol; in case of violation the concession would be lost permanently. In fact the concession-owners rarely sold the drinks themselves. Usually they got in partnership with the restaurant or shops owners, who paid them an agreed monthly sum for the privilege of buying the drinks (an agreement similar to today’s franchise). The concessionary was in the position of a redactor responsible in newspapers, in case of offense he would be the one prosecuted (probably lose the license). In his own interest, not to pay for the fool, he had to care personally about the regulations.

Misior, he found such a business partner, who paid him at first 50 zł monthly, later 80 and finally a full hundred. Still, he chose the partner carefully, resigned of higher stakes, preferring business with honest man and never lost the concession. In the result he had a steady income, all in all near two hundreds zł, which was about equal to top pay of an unqualified worker, many kept his family and home for less.

But even before he arranged all this, just after leaving the hospital, Ian’ girlfriend draw him right to the altar and they married. She assumed that her boy, if even incomplete, is worth more than others in one-piece. All the time she was afraid, that any other girl may be quicker, so maybe the man had some secret benefits? Anyway, she would not wait and cared not for parents’ permit, despite the father, who opposed strongly against accepting an invalid. After almost twenty years Ms. Mary remained nowadays a buxom woman, strong and hardworking, good-looking and formidable. An excellent wife - yet still, as before, concentrated on his man and saw on the world only trough his eyes.

To the little scrap of own soil owned, Misior added several hectares of ground from the agrarian reform. The parceling out of aristocracy and squires estates took unexpectedly long, but he as former yeoman, decorated for bravery and invalided he was in the first turn. However, he left the soil in the care of his parents to their death, adding a new barn and the stable. He settled in the town, where he found an opening for himself, at the construction and development of the Ostrowiec Ironworks. He had two horses and a wagon, being himself as strong and healthy as a horse. In spite of the artificial leg, he managed well. Besides he was not only a dedicated worker, the horse company was for him a true leisure and pleasure, he understood the horses. Earning well he found time to care for his soil and help the parents. After their death he cultivated himself the cereals, using the bar and stable, but decided to build the house in Ostrowiec.

When the house was ready, the wife sold him the idea, that it would be a good business to run a youth hostel to the students of the nearby college. She had a good head not only to recognize the Good sent opportunity, but also in a whirl made all the arrangements. They had a good opinion in the parish and with the school, there were no problems considering it was the family of former volunteer, a war invalid and patriot. She booked the cabinet on the first floor, exactly this, which now took Angus’ mother and two rooms on the second floor. Nominally, they were two plus five places, but usually not all taken, in average there would be one or two paying quest down and about four up.

Angus in awe and amazement saw later, how much work may manage daily, simply one woman. First in the morning, she milked the cows, fresh milk necessary for breakfast. The beasts had the breakfast too, giving something they had to get something. Now the time would come to make the fire in the kitchen stove and prepare something for the people. Angus mother and her son were in no hurry, but before, as they were the students, five to seven growing youths ever hungry an especially in morning with wolfish appetite, the task must be formidable. Afterwards there were more mouths to fill. Still, the steady procedure was ever and ever, feeding first her husband, she attended to this herself and with full devotion. Angus wondered, in his family the father took his breakfast as they all did, without any special attentions. Here it was quite a ceremony and at moments it seemed so intimate, that Angus felt an outsider.

Only later, like a hurricane she prepared a common breakfast and ate herself with their two daughters. Not to mention, that to prepare the breakfast and later the dinner it was necessary to fetch in much water, wood and twins to the stove. Also, take away the dirty water and the ashes, meantime feed the two pigs, boil or rather simmer for them the potatoes, adding there all not eaten leftovers with residual balance.

Once a week she backed her own bread. This was a regular rite, as if religious worship, starting from a day before, with kneading the dough in a wooden bowl on the former breed of acid microbes, then left overnight in exactly regulated temperature until the next noon. Yet already in morning the bread oven in the economy premises was washed and fired. About noon, when the temperature would be right, the oven should be careful cleared of the red-hot coal, swept away, spread with floor and in would be placed the in meantime formed, fitting loaves. The fresh baked bread was every time capital, Angus praised it to the sky, although who never tasted such bread, may never understand the point. Now this, the bread was remarkable well, was a pride of every housewife, even if proud and glamorous. This was exactly her tender spot, almost as it would be an art of sorcery and she had proved her witchcraft repeatedly. The only moment when she may rebuke her daughters, and to be sure as well Angus, was if they behaved too loud at the time the putty was done. It had to grow quietly until tomorrow; a few seconds of disorder may break the spell.

On the other site, it was worth to stay a full day well-mannered, behave and try later the fresh nutriment. Usually the children could get a little surplus dough and form some small loaf pieces that backed together, with the main dish. In fact, Angus remembered to the end of his years the incomparable, unique taste, but never found this again.

Strange, but the own backed breed remained fresh and savory a longtime, almost a whole week. The other benefit was, that after this business ended, to the compartment with the back oven formed a queue. Obviously, the without running water had not a bathroom. But there could be as much of warm water, as many buckets anyone brought from the well, the oven hot a longtime. On the large bank they placed a large wooden washbowl and the willing could splash to the heart content on the floor from the bricks; not exactly a bath, but a thorough washing almost as good. In the winter, the only another opportunity would be to go downtown to the public (common) bath. But, if there would be strong frost, here one had only a short run, about twenty meters to the house, comparing to about an hour quick walk to the town.

The parents of Ian Misior lived not any more, when the new house was build, but Ms. Mary installed her parents in. They lived on the opposite side of hall in a small apartment, consisting of a kitchen and one room. Mary with her sisters and mother had not a happy life, the father and husband was a tyrant, in fact worse as Angus could imagine an egoist and rouge. A tall, strong and impressive man, taking a good position of locomotive machinist with a high salary, he took an unwilling girl from a poor family for a wife or rather unpaid servant. He demanded much, giving nothing, certainly no money for the house, preferring to spend all with a merry company. Nevertheless disciplined his family constantly if they could not manage to live on nothing, in short make their life a hell. In his work he was accurate and disciplined (there was no other way if he wanted to remain with the railway) and probably servile to his chief and a very bad bully as a chief to his men.

Before the WW I he contacted the socialists and took part in the revolution of 1905/6 y. as member of a fighting group of PPS. Between the wars he remained a member of PPS, but frustrated, he expected a much stronger position, become radical, contacting the communists, if not exactly close. Still virile and popular, he had many colleagues and companions and liked to accent their superiority over them, allowed to do so as long, as he had the money. He spent this on the less merry and more and more bad company much tolerant, as on the family. But he ceased to be popular, as he began to spend less and had less money after retiring. Only then it occurred, that the best thing made the daughter, who against his will and bans turned wooden-headed and got in wedlock with a stupid peasant, bare ash without money and as well invalid. He was sure such a son-in-law becomes him not, reduces his importance. And after the fellow’ lucky strike, he liked him less and less.

In they apartment in the kitchen slept in addition the older daughter, Władka, who followed the father advice and in result remained alone. She probably would not have a chance of marriage anyway, she physically was most alike to the father, tall and strong, not at all womanlike. But in spite of his age, still the father held better form, straight as a mast, always in a fresh brushed railroad uniform and shoes with tops knee-high and the railroad cap on head.

He lived now in peace with the son-in-law, but hated him because of his own secondary position, although accepted now the obvious fact, that he false recognized his worth. But being a gifted mechanic (without this ability he could not held so long the position of locomotive driver, rather a top one on the railway), he tried now to repair his house image, doing the repairs. As a handyman he was good, the best. Nevertheless, his pension he still spent exclusively on himself, the daughters took care their mother.

Angus at first hoped that it may be possible to persuade the old man to a help in his projected discoveries, because himself he never had anything in common with mechanics. Not even a simple device he could do, having two left hands, he felt good only in theory. Some practical learning would be much desirable and there was a true gold hand to teach him. But it came to nothing; the old man treated him as a stupid kid, good for nothing (which was surely true). He told the boy, that who does not work, has no right to eat, and who does not know how, shall not be a bore impeding these who know and are able to. In short, to get lost and speedy, because he is not only a no-good, but as well a parasite. Well, but from where come out the splendid men, if they could not learn?

Anyway, Angus was not aware, that if this man agreed to take him as his disciple, his first doing would be give him a hell of a time and break him. Exactly, as he usually did to his apprentices, working on the railway.

The mother of Mary Misior too was such a broken woman, but already composed with life, if rather thinking now about the next life after life. It was a horrible experience, as her parents commanded her in marriage with unwanted, bad man. With worse to come as the monster oppressed her to obedience and tamed with beating. She gave life to tree daughters and a son, who died as child and for this, also her master, charged and punished her. At least now all turned for better, her husband could not bully her so much being in the daughter house and the daughter family cared about her. Only the health was much worse and the prepared for her death, turning religious, but without excessive bigotry. Nevertheless, Angus wondered sometimes about her sound reasoning and observation sense, even if sometimes he could not agree with something.

Nowadays she hoped and enjoyed for one event: that again at the wane of her life, she may see around all tree daughters. The third girl, from the beginning had a better life, cared not only by mother but also by two older sisters. In the first line Mary with her husband, although only at the start of their success, provided the education cost. Nina as the only member of the family passed the high school examine, graduating the Business Lyceum in Ostrowiec. Exactly near end of 1938y, she started the practice in office of Ostrowiec Ironworks; the whole family, even the father, were proud of her. There she met a young beginner clerk, Henry Słodek and married him. In fact, he got all she could want from the fate and her family and took this as due tribute, on account for more, she was an egoist as bad, as her father was. With her husband, they shared the same expectations and ambitions: make a career as quick as possible, at any cost.

Angus at the time had not the opportunity to see her, but heard much from Ms. Misior, who praised her constantly: How pretty and beautiful she is, diminishing all other girls. How clever and educated, how high censures she got in schools and what a splendid perspectives lay before her. Now, she shall live again with the family, because during the war work conditions in the Ironworks got worse, they pay shall freeze and the discipline get up, as in Army. Anyway, there is no question of career, because the German shall take all higher positions and Poles would work obligatory as slaves. They get at best half of nominal pay (which was rather naive, to expect that Germans may stop only at this, the reality turned much worse).

The husband and wife were exactly on a status that made possible going away, the practice time expired and they both received notice. From a married couple only one person could remain in the office and the decision should be up to them. So they took the opportunity to leave both, they wanted not waste their time on a position with rotten perspectives. They did not yet decide what they should do. Temporary they may live with the family and meantime seek out an occupation, matching to the high-level of their self-respect and demands.

They shall take the rooms on the second floor, used for the youth hostel, now empty. Angus did see them in next days. The much-praised Nina was a pretty, maybe beautiful woman with dark complexion and hair and fiery eyes, like Angus imagined the Spain senoritas. Her husband contrary, for a moment if seemed as if she did chose him as a contrast background. He seemed as if drawn after long soaking in water, bleached and with quick moving, hungry eyes. They came in Monday for a short visit and to left their belongings, because Nina still had society liabilities. They should go on some New-year evening, not simple leisure, they may follow some new opening of well-paid work.

The whole family regaled with enthusiasm their coming, admiring the youngest sister, which started the best way and for sure shall arrive to the best on top.

Poor fools! Nobody could expect that if under this roof came Cain and Judas, together, it could be as bad for this home, but not much worse.

The next day Angus aquatinted himself with all the people in the house and the near-by environment and firstly with children. Being the senior and more educated (one level, he finished the fifth class of elementary school), he promised to help the girls in further education. In fact, he tried to appease to all, for example he revived in memory the book from the last batch read in Poznań, about telling the future from the hands (chiromancy). He explained the drawings of lines and tried his luck, watching all the time the reactions of the people concerned. It was a play, but he met with some success, if only by women. They told their friends and acquaintances and Angus feel, he could turn professional, even earn money, but if he accepted anything it would be dishonesty, so he did not.

The real cause for appeasement was, Angus wanted to make friends, because he never resigned from the plan to contact any secret organization or create one. So far he found no one, with whom he may talk, the women seemed not fitting such part, the girls much too young. Besides the winter got extremely cold and sharp, the frost and snow caused, that mother allowed him not out. He could only look on the street and the forest on opposite side, especially in detail the courtyard and garden of Kawiorskich site. This squire family owned a longtime the former village Piaski, being now the name of the street. There was the best well by a long-distance, the best and healthy water. Ms Misior went there for drinking water, only the water for general use she took from own well: she had a steady allowance, one could say, privilege. Other person did too, the Kawiorscy withhold the water to nobody. By the well meet, well, “the cream of local society” from this street people in doubt would go elsewhere. And really, tee done with this water was better, not mentioning the social prestige. Angus many times went with Ms. Misior and twisted the windlass (the well was considerably deep and this took more time), but was too weak to lift only one bucket, not to say two. So he only helped alternatively, first one bucket and after a time the second (or rather, hindered the transport). Much of a fest

Angus affiliated friendship not only with people, but as well with the beasts: pigs, cows and even with the “very bad” dog, Alsatian wolfhound. The family, to show their political feeling, their sympathy for opposition, called him “Bek”. This was the name of a minister, too much and it caused a police intervention and a fine, but the family, feeling rather strongly about their law, held firm their ground and the name remained. Angus understood the dogs, the whole life being with them on amicable foot, much better as with men, but this time he had to resign. Bek had to be a “bad” dog, it was his duty and no one little stinker could be allowed to change his nature. Spoiling the long education would be not tolerated and any private contacts with the “bad” dog firm forbidden, sorry. Because their both already fell to ones other heart, Angus received, not only a total ban for contacts, but in evening time, when Bek could freely run on the yard, Angus was prohibited to exit there.

New Year's Eve and Day was not much of a fest. All bidden each another the swift end of war with the understanding, devil may take Hitler possibly with no delay, best before the twelfth hour. Ian Misior often drove his horse vehicle to his soil and premises, to control, if the snow is not too heavy on the roof. Also to bring in more cereals for the beasts, to grind it in the mill for flour and so on. This time he got more talkative, mentioning something, which seemed impossible:

- There are still Polish colors in the forest. There is hope, that in the spring neither the French alone shall beat up the German Army, nor we shall wait for the Polish Army, regenerating in France. -

Even the wife expressed some doubt:

- How do you now? You didn’t see this by your eyes?

- There were some, who did, whole troops, not only infantry, as well horses. They are not elopers, regular troops in control of officers – flatly insisted Misior.

Angus did not know how to judge this news. He by himself produced in the past some comforting tales, yet this time this looked serious. On the other side, such news was hard to contain in the head, so low probable it seemed. Nevertheless later it was confirmed, a straight truth. This concerned the detached troop of Polish regular Army, the leftover of a cavalry regiment, which later become the first guerrilla troop of the underground army. The fighting on Polish earth continued without stops, all the war long, if sure, less intent after the calamity of 1939. Without doubt, the impact on the Polish society was great.

Soon afterwards, in the New Year, Angus tried his best shot to convince mother, to allow him for an excursion on the sleighs accompanying Mr. Ian Misior. If only once, at the first occasion, when he glides again to his ground and barn, But the mother remain firm, he had none chances.

- You do not understand, what you ask. There are terrible frosts, even at noon the temperature touches -30 grades. Often there is -40. For a little kid, like you (what an outrage!), it could be fatal. A big, strong man is another kettle of fish. In no circumstances, I do allow for such madness. -

Surely, Angus never mentioned of his true purpose. He wanted on the way talk one-to-one with Mr. Misior, next get in touch with the troop, or at least with those, who know where find it. He wanted at least to fight! But to the mother, he dared persuade only, to plead, how unique would be such excursion, the wonderful regions, the beauty of the forest, the wonderful air. Never in life may appear again such capital opportunity. He would travel with best care, with a patron who repeatedly makes this way. There is not any danger, not mentioning sickness, he shall dress warm indeed. He has forgotten any cold, cough; exactly this way he shall get more health, fresh air is the best source of this.

Anyway, it was nothing doing. The cause was simple: It was the mother who decided first for a risky expedition, a dangerous voyage despite the exceptional sharp winter, deep frost and snow. Much more dangerous was the severe rule of the occupant, prohibiting Poles to travel without a special permit from the district or town commissar. Even more so, the general law, demanded a passport with actual pass, to cross a border. Now the fact was, mother wanted go to the Greatpoland, incorporated now into Germany and from where she was deported, which meant a war offense. If she would be detected, she would end in best case in a concentration camp again, but not only temporary, as before. In the worst fall, she could be shot without any process. To be sure, she wanted not visit her house or recover some of her property, this would be a very stupid and ugly suicide. She decided not show herself in Poznań, but only changing there the trains, reach her sister and family in Podłoziny, asking for more help. It was a crazy adventure, which may turn deadly.

To tell it straight: The comparatively soft-landing in Ostrowiec (if the push with a rifle butt, throwing a woman from the train on the rails may be so called) was possible only because mother was able to hide some money. The rest of these, what the German policies and soldiers demanded and robbed at the point of a gun. Afterwards, her sister and niece, when supplying her in the concentration camp with the most necessary for survival objects, smuggled in as contraband some more money. She must spend the most necessary expenses, paid for the hospital cure and now the deposit for the locum and keeping in the hostel. She would not tell Angus, how much money she already used and Angus knowing her accepted, there is no sense to insist. Probably she was not satisfied with herself, but no way to guess, if it was too less or too much. Only once she answered his question indirect, asking, how much their lives may be worth.

The deposit for the hostel she calculated for six months, because even the worst pessimists never believed, the war may last longer. Without a wink of eyelid she paid Ms Misior 1500 zł deposit, 250 zł a month, double of the sum usually the students paid. She wanted to feel safe with a long-term agreement and, because with the experience from WW I she was sure, an inflation shall follow and so it happened shortly. Ms Misior expected this also, but even so, this family wanted the money badly. Several months they earned nothing and now they had some opportunity, but needed an investment capital now and early.

The rest of money mother invested in a common with Misior business (described in the next Chapter), but at first she never reported anything to the son. Sure all the deals were a masterstroke, profitable for both sides and Mr. and Ms Misior proved honest and proper people. The loan plus the advance, was enough for the beginning.

However, mother felt badly with little money reserve and her journey was an act of desperation. She saw much misery, the primary eruption of solidarity was splendid, but many of the deported, poor beggars had a very hard time. She considered, if not the money, she would probably perish with her son. Only now, she told Angus about the arrangements, that they have a place to live with board for half of a year. If she would de detained for longer, it would be good about a year for Angus alone. Afterwards he still would have back the loan and his share of the profit. Sure, mother never told about the possibility of no return, talking as if this would be a trip of leisure, no danger at all. The only possible cause of delay may be, she insisted, if the aunt shall extend her hospitality.

- I shall be back in a fortnight, possibly even in one week, supposing all the conditions remain favorable. –

Only now Angus realized, what is she talking about (sure, in a small part, as much as he was able to) and terrified, begged her never do this. Anyway, all his arguments were for nothing, mother remained stubborn and determined.

Now it seems necessary a comment and some explanation. Never mind the appearances; it was more as a crazy conception of a silly woman in distress. She had some experience and expertise, an exceptional skill, touch and competence, in the first place the perfect language with the matchless Berliner accent. She moved in Germany frequently in the years after the WW I, got the knowledge and did this full natural (as mentioned in Chapter 1). It is only guesswork, but after years Angus supposed, she may be for a time a professional courier of Polish organizations from Poland to Westphalia and back again. She never told a word, but this seems the only logical explanation of her many journeys in the early twenties, some to the other border of Germany or even to the North France. Also, from the special knowledge of many small and unimportant details. The case of the burned in end of September 1939y papers, official thanks and testimonials from the National Council of Greatpoland (mysterious, considering she returned after the 1918y rising, in late 1919). Obviously, she became disillusioned to secret organizations. She considered, in conspiracy the directorates contain often the irresponsible manipulators, reckless and thoughtless, which arrange actions wrong organized and the consequences fall on the simple people. The disaster falls on the heads of the most valuable idealists or the plain suckers. Such opinion she held to the end of life; alas, she could do great deeds indeed, for example in the resistance, if not the prejudice.

At another occasion she commented bitter and harsh the transfer of Polish miner workers from Westphalia to France. An action taken in the exclusive interest of the French, despite the harm to the Polish families, who already found in Westphalia satisfying work and living conditions. They were free of any national persecution and already domesticated there. In France, they found worse conditions, not mentioning the Spartan pilgrimage. (However, maybe it was not such a bad deed after all, that a large part of Poles left there before Hitler came to power.)

Nevertheless, she knew a different Germany. There is not the smallest doubt, that she underestimated the dangers very much. If she would be found out and catch, she hoped to talk her way back. If the worst came to the worst, she would tell her woe and explain, that she was born in Greatpoland and lived there. She would admit a mistake, considering, the German law, responding the international convention about the rights of civil population living on the occupied territory in war, accepted and ratified by Germany, allows her to return. Not to her confiscated former flat, she would never do this, but only to plead for help. She was only instructed never came back to the flat, but not to her whole native land. Sorry indeed and she still hopes, the crime in this exceptional fall is not too serious.

If she would be not executed on the spot and still insisted to stand before the jury and repeat this rigmarole about civil rights and international law, it would be adding outrage to offense. She probably would be sentenced for insult to the jury and the country (“Das tausendjaeriges Reich”). Possibly for "Landesverrat" (high treason), to decapitation with an ax. Such punishment became fashionable in Greatpoland; it was an old law, not applied for many years, yet especially revived, with hundreds and thousands of Poles concerned. In fact, Germany with Hitler ceased to be a civilized and high cultural state, returned to the savage, barbaric punishments, not only informal - in the dungeons of Gestapo - also in a full majesty of law.

To be sure, Angus was unaware about these aspects. He never had any documents, did not even know, what is an ID and never cared about such matter, if only sometime needing a card for special rebate or some benefit in a shop. He never saw a documents control, before the war twice crossed shortly the borders, to Gdańsk and Rumania, only on the strength of a railway ticket. The point is he knew nothing at all about security policy, arrangements and security forces of the Germans. He imagined, the only real danger for mother excursion, may come from nature, the winter being exceptionally sharp, the frost and the snow deep. In fact, he considered it unfair, that mother decided for such a long-distance journey in so difficult weather, but does not allow him an excursion of only some 15 km. More so, in care of experienced man, who commutes it almost ever day. Well, world is an unjust place and there is not a hope, before one becomes an adult.

It was beyond imagination that his mother, without any passport dared enter Germany, crossing one of the most controlled borders in Europe. A noble looking, elderly lady in company of high officers entered the train compartment "only for the Germans" without a pass. Former she bough a ticket of first-class, without any certified permit; then back again, and took such a deadly risk, wild venture for the sake of the family, meaning her son. Yet, what a potential she had and why did she not used it for a better, common cause? It was like a lioness on her way to provide the supply for the cub. Sure, if he suspected the truth, he would never allow mother to step out from the house, if only over his dead body.

More so, Angus overdid the business, if he talked not so eager about his plan, he could now came to understanding with his temporary guardian, after mother left. This was only a guess, anything what could, or could not follow from his idea; better forget it now. The most what he could do now, would be walks along the street, some distance around.

About one km from crossing Piaski Street with the roadway to Starachowice, on the north was a great, almost empty meadow called “Błonia”, with a great, modern building of elementary school. On the opposite, south side stood the mentioned already building of the college (Gymnasium and Lyceum in memory of Joachim Chreptowicz'a), which was not so big and modern, but with old and respectable tradition. Now both the constructions used the German Army. The bigger one, of elementary school became “Detsches Heim” (club- and boardinghouse for the soldiers and officers). The college was a plain quarters for troops. This associated in Angus memory with the time, as he started amateurishly the undercover reconnaissance in Poznań by the Śniadeckich Street. There too, in the Business College the German Army placed some important staff. His efforts were futile, but be was sure, the idea was correct, so why not take a little stroll there, to see what was what?

Despite the deep frost, he usually strolled in only a ski uniform (taking warm under closes). Sometimes on the ski, sometime not, be only began learn skiing. One could almost say, an unisex fashion, but at the times such expression was unknown. Nevertheless, several times he heard, in the closes one could doubt, if he is a boy or a girl. This gave him an extra stupid idea: perhaps he could conduct his mission posing for a girl.”

Well, as the petty officer mentioned in the episode in the Chapter 2 would say – “Boys are often silly and this is their privilege, but this is more stupid the constitution allows.” – It was the matter of his upbringing, old fashioned, Victorian, or rather hypocrisy with a pretense false well-bred, but he knew nothing about sex, less than any 7-year old child from any village.

He never thought that if his plan succeeded and he could step into the building, the soldiers would not behave like white knights, treating the supposed girl with respect. Rather they would consider this is a professional visit and in no time found out, it is not a girl but a boy. In best case, they would suspect him of espionage and turn to the Gestapo, in worst, they may take him for a degenerated transvestite; anyway it would end fatal.

However, it happens sometime, that one calamity expels another, one death saves another life.

Angus started late morning, after the second breakfast, because the frost was notable, but the sun shone from a clear sky. At distance of a few hundred m. from home he crinkled the shawl, and relieved both ends, “making himself” a maid. The street was empty and he had a clear run, anyway he was still unknown there. To his astonishment, he saw a small group near the junction of the street with the highway and some person, hurrying there. Strange, in such a sharp frost rarely one meets any single person. Yet the group stood immovable, the men with bare heads in spite of the cold, all were looking at one place. There laid some debris of clothes, what may be so interesting in some wear and tear pieces of material? He asked –“What happened? What's the matter?”

- The German soldier shot a small girl, a Jewess. -

- Jesus, Maria! – Angus only now noticed the child, those spread belongings covered a lean girl, smaller and probably younger than he was. She must put all of this no herself because of the cold. Blood was almost invisible, it must run under the snow, or maybe the snow came on the top.

He heard an account, what happened recently, likely only a few minutes before he got from the house.

Three Germans walked along the roadway in direction of the city or the quarters. Suddenly one began loudly swear and cry, commanded the little girl to come and she walked to him. After a short talk, without notice he lifted the pistol and shot, twice. Then he motioned some person, who looked from the houses and required, the corpse shall lay in the place till tomorrow. That is, unless they want not see him here again, he may do a short business with them and with the houses too. He called, that this girl, little Jewess committed a crime against occupation laws going out without a visible mark, yellow patch with a David Star. The two companions certificated and confirmed his doing, as well praised admiring his observation accuracy and shrewdness. Yet the poor girl may have the marking on, but as she took more and more closes on top because of the cold she could overlap the mark.

Sure, this was a deed of a special villain, but the most shocking was, that he acted strictly in accord with the German laws. This action, instead meet a blame of a crime, the dirty felony, met with a full acceptance of his companions. “Ordnung muss sein” (Order is necessary) – well, but it should be an order of a graveyard. Agreed, such acts happened rare and were individual, but were a prophecy of foul, black future.

Not a wonder that exactly this event and this corpse, although he saw already many deed people, were like a kick in stomach and remained in Angus memory. It may be the unexpected, he saw a heap of rags and suddenly there was a dead child, but he could still picture this perspective with full details after years. Now he remembered one book, it was “the Captain Breakhead” an adventure novel about the second Boer War. The episode when the young boy touches the blood of the shot men and later front of his head as a symbol for rest of life. He wanted do the same. As some women knelt to pray, he knelt too but could not feel the blood in the snow, as if it vanished. On an impulse he took of a thin silver neck chain with a thin medallion, this ruptured many times before, but which he somehow always found.

Now he wedged this in the hand of the girl. Only years later he realised, that his impulse may be an offense to the Jewish religion of this child. At the time, he never though of this, he acted on the moment notion and this was never his purpose. He wished simply to express his sorrow and sympathy. But it may be hoped, that none God shall take this badly, anyway the Saint Mary on the medallion was a Jewess too. Similar as the prayers for the deceased were not meant so, all the men took of their hats, but would not offend any religion.

After some time, Angus continued to the college, but was so badly shaken, that resigned and withdrew home. He told about what he saw to Ms Misior and she asked him not repeat this to her daughters. Miss Mary with his sister took the wrappers and went there. The corpse remained on the view the whole day, taken away only tomorrow. Horrible dictu, the Germans genuine wanted to show an example, a terrible lesson; maybe the “soldier” was an important Nazi, from the SS-unit. It was the first time, an unexpected case, whereas later, especially in 1944, often the dead were left as educating exhibition and nobody wondered.

At the spot, where laid the body, appeared some flowers, which in no time froze in the deep freeze. Next, they appeared several times more, odd, where whoever could take them, considering the sharp winter. Afterwards they appeared again in the spring, until step-by-step it all it all got into oblivion. However the fashion remained: in the places where happened public executions and the occupants deposited (or hung, as for example on the city market) the bodies, always appeared flowers. One could say, on wholesale scale now, whereas the first time it was a small business, detailed. The most of this happened in the year 1944. In years before appeared only the announcements posted on the house walls, usually one after another, with the names of the already butchered and the next, to be butchered. Yet in the y.1944 this changed, in the city run the typical trucks, called “suki” (the bitches} from which the escort put out the hostages, shot them and left the bodies on the street to the next day. Each of the spots become later covered with flowers.

In effect of the incident Angus panicked, only now he began to recognize the deadly danger, into which moved his mother. They never suspected, how bad the scheme is, never recognized right the height of the terror. Only now, he realized that she went straight into the wolfish yaws and he could do nothing about this. Instead, in direction of city or German quarters, Angus began walk now in the opposite side, to a chapel, managed by the order sisters, where the future parson celebrated many a temporary mass, before the church shall be ready.

Angus prayed desperately and made promises to God, bids so great, that in fact virtual, he would be not able to fulfill them even if he could live twice. He never in life was so pious, spent whole days on prayers, maybe not so desperate as the first morning in Ostrowiec, when he run for the doctor. Once he lost conscious in the chapel, the long stress got him down. Some luck, he was alone and this happened unnoticed. He lost all interest, beyond the daily or twice daily march to the end of the street and next about one and half km toward the dark line of Iłża forest. He treated the snow, widening the path only between the fields and a young detached forest to the buildings of the chapel and closure.

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